Therapy With Meech: What Your Hocus Pocus Sexual Awakening Character Says About You

Thackery Binx, Allison's yabbos, BILLY BUTCHERSON! A lot to unpack!

Ah, spooky season.

The time when people stop being polite, and start getting real, when the leaves begin to change, and orchards start charging $27 for two squirts of spiked apple cider and a bag of apples you have to pick yourself (what is this, slavery?!) I won’t lie—I’m getting a lil aroused! I’ve never been a big spooky girlie, I can only handle one (1) Pumpkin Spice Latte a year, because as many of you know, I’m more of a Spiced Cider babe.

Luxurious libations aside, what’s got me bricked up like the wall Justin Timberlake should be buried alive behind is that it’s finally SWEATER WEATHER! I love a good chilly day, and I love autumn in New York, but what I love most is grabbing a warm drink, staring out the droplet-filled windowpane and wondering why I am the way I am—but this week, I am—here to help YOU! To tell you what your spooky sexual awakening from the iconic Disney film Hocus Pocus says about you! Not me being selfless!