Why Is Everyone Suddenly Sharing Screenshots from Their Dating Apps?
Plus: Now That I Mention It is almost a year old!
Before we get into all that—We are 30 days away from the 1 year anniversary of me starting this newsletter. I truly can’t believe we’ve come this far, and I am so thankful all of you (new and old) have come along for the ride. I am so grateful you enjoy reading my silly little words, and indulge my rants. You’re so obsessed with me!
As such, for the next few weeks, all I ask is that if you enjoy my newsletter, refer your friends! You’ll appear on my Hot Girl Summer Leader Board (also called the referrals leader board), and at the end of that 30 days—on August 22nd, our actual anniversary the top three people on the board will receive a personal gift from yours truly.
Okay, so—In the late 1900s (cringe) circa 1998—before dating apps existed, but after seedy personal ads in the back of newspapers came about, people used to date online using something called electronic mail, which gave us one of the most unhinged “romcoms” of our time—You’ve Got Mail.
It is no secret I hate this movie.
Like, really hate.
Intensely hate.
The premise is insane, but also—are we supposed to root for a man who LIED and ruined this woman’s small family business? The same man who barely shows his dog until the end of the movie? I don’t think so! And that’s kind of my point. You really are taking your chances with people on these apps, and more often than not, everyone isn’t actually on here to find love, or even date for that matter.
A lot of people are on dating apps like Tinder, Hinge, and Bumble to gain social media followers, feel desirable, or pass the time. (I would say Grindr too, but that’s more of a hookup app, and people use it for its purpose!) Some people like to just use those apps to boost their self esteem, and all of that is well and good—if you and the person you’re chatting with are on the same page. But all too often, you’re not.
Lately, it feels like we’re entering an era of people being on dating apps simply to chase clout on social media, with every exchange being posted for someone to tell them that they’re worth more and should be treated better. Y’all remember Ice Creamgate! Ice cream/sorbet is a perfectly fine first date that allows you an easy escape if you both don’t—as Cher Horowitz says—mesh well. Also, if someone suggests something you don’t like, why not offer another suggestion? Communicate!
Sure, everyone deserves to find someone who respects them, also, most of them screenshots? Baby the people who post them are in the wrong. Take the example of one of the most recent viral tweets:
A woman says a guy’s profile is insanely catered to the female gaze. Perfectly fine/harmless/mundane opening line. He screenshots it, and tweets it.
First of all, why are you doing that? Like—have you no couth?
Obviously she sees the tweet because it goes viral, and she presses him about it. What follows is an unhinged flurry of messages of him being a complete asshole. He also notes the likes, because if we’re being honest, that’s why he posted it to begin with.
And not to victim blame, but ladies and gentlemen of James Marsden’s jury—look at him. Ain’t no way I woulda matched.
And to be completely honest, Trevor Drinkwater is right!
My thing is—are you that desperate for strangers on the internet to validate you? Did your parents not love you? And then I remember parents filming their children in peril and posting it on TikTok for likes, and that just tells me there is nothing in the world these people won’t do for the internet to make them feel loved for 2 seconds.
And then there’s this person—If you have no intention of talking to someone, why keep the match? Why allow them to keep messaging you? Is it so you can feel desired?
It’s one thing to send this kind of stuff to the groupchat, but to me, it just reads as desperate, everyone involved. I think we should bring back shame, and the guillotine.
Anyway—
Mini Mention:
The Battle of Barbenheimer
Today I’m seeing Barbie and Oppenheimer, and contrary to this tweet, I will be seeing them in that order!
I know, I know—but the thing is, I am a sad boy! I like to be sad! I don’t think I’d be able to focus on the joy of coming away from Barbie to go into the despair of Oppenheimer. But I’m hearing whispers (and spoilers) that it sends you into an existential crisis anyway, so, two birds one stone!
As always—Thank you all so much for subscribing to Now That I Mention It—and now that I mention it, thank you for being a friend!
a man on hinge once told me “you look interesting” as an opening line
another one was like “i’ll match with you if you can tell me who was in paris” and so i matched just so i could see if he meant what i thought he meant and when i said niggas he was like yep! and before you ask yes he was